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studying December 13, 2016

Filed under: Uncategorized — springtwist @ 12:03 pm

for better or worse, the whole term will be over tomorrow.  i rocked my first exam and im going to be okay on the anatomy one.

last night i was pretty convinced that i wasn’t going to though. i recognized it as lack of sleep and needing to quit for the night and go to bed. tucked in one last 40 min studying to finish up the chapter all about brains then took thalia to bed and we slept really well. blaze gave me hell this morning, cordelia ended up walking to school by herself. she is awesome – shes not a little kid anymore, shes very quickly becoming her own grown up kind of person. she will be 7 in the spring. SEVEN. the baby we thought about aborting. the marker of our time spent as parents. the amount of years since i graduated from undergrad. blaze meanwhile alternates between being the sweetest, most gentle soul and being posessed by satan. she keeps pretending to be a puppy these days – she thinks shes a long hired poofy puppy. really shes a tenacious terrier of some kind  – loud, all over the place, high energy, stubborn, clinging to things and shaking them until they shred. like my patience. we were very very very late for school. i send coco on ahead so she at least could be on time. ive been studying so much and blaze is telling me its actually too much. shes uses high volume to tell me this.

breezed through parasympathetic/sympathetic nervous systems in one hour this morning, and i have about half an hour left before i need to be home. gotta stay on track for this lat little bit of home stretch. then i will knit all the things and throw myself at christmas prep. hang out with my girls. slather lots of love on blaze to help her get balanced again .


December 8, 2016

Filed under: Uncategorized — springtwist @ 11:30 am

i feel like im reaching a limit here. which is a bit scary becasue i only have two exams to get through. this is not the worst of what school will be like – placement on top of classes will be super hard. if i can’t handle two exams then placement will kill me.

i have done nothing today. the thought of doing anything is daunting. there’s so much to do and i want to go sit in a hole somewhere – i am getting ‘you need to slow down right now’ signals from myself. i have to ignore this becasue! i need to study – i need to, i don’t have much time left now. i need to clean up my fucking house. i need to seriously clean it, like the walls and the baseboards and pull out the fridge and get all the shit out from under and behind the couch and whatever is behind the toilet. i do not have the time or the energy or the motivation and yet it still needs to be done.

i went to class all day yesterday. and came home to a fucking disaster. its like punishment for going to class. it falls to me because im the only one who is home to do it.