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38 July 4, 2015

Filed under: Uncategorized — springtwist @ 8:05 am

I’ve changed my tune in the past 24 hours. Blaze has thrown up a couple times already and hasn’t been able to sleep since, I’m estimating because I didn’t look at a clock til later, about 4am.

Now with this virus making its way through us all, I’m telling baby “stay in! Stay in!”

there’s really not much in the world that’s more heartbreaking then blaze, throwing up into the toilet and crying, and trying to take deep breaths between heaving and then looking up and jim and asking “Dada will i be okay?”

At one point she lay down on the bathroom mat and tried to sleep there.

We took turn originally. Jim went to help her, and then next time I went to help her, and sometimes we both went to help her since one of us needed to do the wiping and consoling of the child and the other needed to do the stripping of the couch cushions. And eventually it became clear that sleeping was over. It doesn’t make sense for us both to not sleep, so Igot up for good and let jim sleep. I can hopefully nap later, but at least one of us will marginally well-rested enough to handle the day.

I’m looking around me at the chores. The never ending stream of things to keep up with. I am sick too but at least I’m not throwing up. Yesterday I slept a lot and did next to nothing. Today i aim to do the same. The apartment will just dissolve into a shithole around me and wait for me to get better again before Ihave the energy to take care of things.


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