got the girls to school. went back to bed. cats came to keep me company. demanded that Jim come hug me a few times. picked up blaze, got her a snack, tided the kitchen, emptied the dishwasher and half-loaded it again, made more bread. ignored the stuff that is SOMEHOW all over the floor again.
my pelvis pops when i walk. i can’t even identify which part of my pelvis. where i feel it popping is where i know there isn’t a bone. yesterday I cleaned up the girls room and then came to ask Jim very awkwardly if he could maybe come pick up the last toys from the floor so I could vacuum? bending over makes my bones slide around uncomfortably. the last trek of pregnancy causes a hormone to be released which makes your ligaments mushy. my bones need to be able to slide past each other in order to squeeze out a tiny, fully complete human. it really is a tight fit. but in the meantime, it makes my joints sore. especially with the past three rainy, heavy-air-pressure days.
baby is really opinionated. i can’t lay on my left. must be however shes positioned herself, which seems to be mostly leaning into the right side of my uterus. if I’m on my right side my uterus makes a little hammock. if I’m on my left, she kicks me.
I’m slowing down. I’ve been slowed down for a while and I’m fucking tired of it. i don’t do ‘slowed down’. theres so much to do each day and i just can’t get to it all. i feel useless and lazy. i read something somewhere briefly about how being in the final few weeks of pregnancy, your body is doing about the same amount of work as Micheal Phelps does in a swimming race every day. i am tired, i can’t bend over, the chores keep mounting up and the girls keep trashing the place and undoing everything i do every day. instead, the girls just watch too much tv each day while i lay in bed. it feels gross.
braxton-hicks practice contractions. seriously, we don’t need to practice, uterus. i know you can push a baby out in half an hour. in fact, its probably better if you are out of practice and a bit rusty. i looked at my old midwifery records for my past labours, and apparently i went from 7cms to birthing blazes head is 9 minutes. yeah… thats supposed to take about 3 hours, as a general rule of thumb. my midwife told me that shes going to teach me to catch my own baby since there is a very real chance that she won’t get there fast enough. labour is supposed to be an all-day process. but for me, it might just be a quick addition to one of our afternoons. i could get up in the morning, eat breakfast, do some laundry, make the girls a snack, quickly drop a baby, then go turn the laundry over, answer some emails and make dinner. maybe i’ll start my labour by making a cake. and then while it’s baking i can just simply take 40 minutes and give birth! then we can pull the warm cake out of the oven and eat it. perfect.